While I have written more about my older daughter (kid 1) as she was knee deep in the college athletic recruiting process, my now 9th grade son’s experience has been looming. As he shared with me, “you’re gonna spend the same time with me you did with her, right?” Absolutely. I am all in. As long as he stays committed to working his craft and shows a love of the game, in this case – lacrosse – count me in.
Late this summer he went through a series of tryouts for different club teams. Biasedly, he is a good player. He’s fast, quick, nimble, and has a good off hand (like basketball – an important skill). If he remains dedicated and continues to love the sport – he will have college opportunities, I have no doubt. Oh, and as his school coach said, “you have to stay humble.” With boys, this is more of a thing – ego can get too much in the way. Fortunately (or in some cases not), Haller’s don’t do ego well. So, after three program tryouts, he was offered spots in all three programs. Not necessarily to the level he wanted but was offered spots on three teams.
Having been through the travel team experience with my daughter, there are some things I look for in evaluating which club team to pursue. The most competitive team, while appealing and a bright shiny object, is not one. I look for a program where the kid is put first – where the kid matters. Where can he make a difference and not just be a cog in a program’s machine? Competitiveness matters but is not the end all be all. Next, where can he get the most repetition via practice or tournament play? Not to burnout level and not where the costs are exorbitant for a few tournaments and only a few practices.
Ultimately, he is playing for four teams this fall. It sounds insane I know but it works and is not as crazy as it sounds. Thank goodness for excel where you can create a schedule – which team on which date at which location. After putting all the team’s practices and tournament schedules in one place, while there were conflicts, it was not as many as I thought. His school team practices all fall but he will practice with them only in September as in October his main club team kicks in. There is another national team with one out of state tournament and another club team that only plays two tournaments and has one weekend commitment. I had him stick with one of the club teams because they will have him play a different position and to me, based on my daughter’s experience, the more positions a kid can play and know, the more valuable and versatile over time. I also made the decision that he will not practice the day after a weekend tournament.
It took a few conversations on the home front to get everyone rowing in the same direction. Which team and why and which location when. I had thought it through to a meaningful degree but needed to have others hear me out and catch up to my thinking and logic.
Biasedly, I am excited for my son. He is in a better position than my daughter was at her age because of what I learned from her experience. I will not associate him with programs where coaches don’t care. I now know enough about finding competitive programs that are at an appropriate skill level where he can compete, learn, have fun, and make a difference. I found with lacrosse the sport is further developed than softball. There are more camp and clinic opportunities where a kid can get pulled in too many directions. Being choosy about which camp to attend and which program to participate in is part of the balancing act.
Continuing to engage your kid in the decision-making process to ensure they are bought in and having fun while excited is important. For now, I am leading the charge, but my kid influences the decisions and provides feedback. Like I have said before, it is a journey – a process – a ride. I am ready for kid 2. 😊
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